Sunday, March 6, 2011

MARRIAGE: What's Was It Designed For? (Vox Pop)

Here are your own published opinions on what Marriage is, and what it is created to achieve in mankind...

Mary Achor-Ogungbola
Reasons for marriage
1. For companionship and intimacy: I'm not sure one can be very intimate (on all levels i.e. physical, emotional, spiritual, financial and any other "al" there might be) with more than one person at a time. So, the of two people together is supposed to engender this attribute for the satisfaction/fulfillment of the parties involved.
2. To prevent sexual irresponsibilities (fornication and adultery) in both men and women. Marriage is honourable for sexual activites (the bed undefiled). The man cleaving to his own wife and the wife cleaving to her own husband. It makes sense for organisation within a human society (not lower animals) and makes for sanity. This is also important as it creates trust within the society. In this sense, polygamy can be viewed as a means of encouraging sexual indiscipline among the male folk.
3. It is an avenue for godly children to be raised. It is an avenue for young ones to experience the love of a father and a mother (which can be compared to that of our heavenly father) and also to be nurtured with the right prinicples and values. This will build young men and women who are not dysfunctional and can relate to the society in which they live with a balanced outlook/attitude.
4. Lastly but more importantly, marriage is an example of the creator's love for his creation. It's a mortal symbol of his immortal joining of himself with his church. Loving and then sacrificing himself for the sake of the church. No act of selfishness is seen in this act, purely based on LOVE!See more

Beloved Apostle Bimpe
ummn... Marriage!
Now that I am out of it, I understand it a lot better.
When I was young, it was a status that must be acquired. mandated by the society, by which your parent would be honoured in it. Hence, it you fail to marry at a particu...lar point in time, it becomes a curse; A TABOO RESTING ON YOU!

At that time, you not only go out to shop for who will marry you, but you go parading for someone to come along to your parents. For this reason, every man or woman that you encounter become a look alive groom or an eligible husband, never minding compatibility and consequences of failure in the near future together!

All you look forward to is the ceremony and the exhibition of ringed finger; showcasing you are now Mrs. somebody.

However, God ordained the yoking of man and woman from the beginning in His will to achieve certain purposes.

It began with the creation of man(Adam) in His image.
"And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth."Gen 1:26.

The primary reason for the creation of man was to take the place of God's responsibility over other creatures. At some point, after the creation of man, God reasoned that man had no perfect companion among other creatures after Adam named them. "And out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field, and every fowl of the air; and brought them unto Adam to see what he would call them: and whatsoever Adam called every living creature, that was the name thereof. And Adam gave names to all cattle, and to the fowl of the air, and to every beast of the field; but for Adam there was not found an help meet for him."-Gen.2:19-20

"And the LORD God said, It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him."-Gen. 2:18.

"And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam, and he slept: and he took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh instead thereof; And the rib, which the LORD God had taken from man, made he a woman, and brought her unto the man. And Adam said, This is now bone of my bones, and flesh of my flesh: she shall be called Woman, because she was taken out of Man.
Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall cleave unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh. And they were both naked, the man and his wife, and were not ashamed."-Gen.2:21-25.

"So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth."-Genesis.1:27-28.

From the above set words of God, it is clear that God commanded all other creatures out of earth with their breath in it, but He made man He carefully molded to be Him, and He produced the woman out of the man that the two might find it convenient to reason as one. A COMPANIONSHIP MADE SO PERFECT!


Having said this, I was to say that our parents thought well by looking forward to their children getting married some day, but care must be taken in making growing up children understand the purpose of marriage in the original plan of God.

For what the sinful nature of man has made of marriage institution, you find out that, marriage has become a different thing from the original insight of God and it is a reason marriages are to achieve purpose of compliment to fulfillment today.

Now that I had been in and out of marriage, now grace to know my God, I believe, marriage is a gift from God to humanity, and one will only partake of the fulfillment when you live uprightly and keep the company with the upright. The grooming you have in life and the the association you keep goes a long way to determine the man or woman that will cross your path.See more

Adejuwon J-One Anjoorin
Mary Anchor Ogungbola has said it all!

The only addition more that I have is marriage is also for the mutual fulfillment of destiny. God gives a man to a woman and vice versa so that each will complement the other's strengths, talents, weakn...esses. They will sharpen each other's countenance(s). Keep each other focused. They will be the iron that sharpeneth iron. They will become the three fold cord (with God) that cannot be easily broken. And they will be blessed for when one stumbles, the other will help raise him up. The mutual fulfillment of destiny is also a key reason for marriage!See more

Kemi Jorge-Oyewusi
Mary Anchor wrote it all and then Adejuwon finished it up with what could have been my addendum.

Relationship is what God is all about. God is relationship and His Power is released in and by relationshipPs133. God created Man for fellowship... (relationship). God has likened Christ's relationship to and with the Church to that of a husband and a wife, why? Lets look at what The Word says:
He says a husband must love his wife and the wife must submit and they should live in unity eph5:21-25, Gen2:24.
He says the husband must be willing to sacrifice his all, even his life to make sure the wife fulfils her destiny of purity and glory Eph5:25-28.
He says the husband and wife must not fail in coming together (knowing themselves) frequently 1Cor7:3-5.
He says the coming together of the husband and wife as one flesh(in flesh and as one entity) is a mystery.

Marriage is a great mystery that typifies the Mystery of Christ. God uses marriage to help us have an experiencial understanding of INTIMATE RELATIONSHIP WITH GOD. Marriage is a covenant. It speaks of the covenant we have with Christ. Covenants are binding relationships engaged for mutual benefit. Every covenant should be carefuly contemplated before being cut. Both parties should be rock solid sure that concerned parties can deliver on the terms. In the marriage covenant one is to see clearly how one can strengthen the other's weakness' and vice versa. The one compliments the other so that they both can FUNCTION AT MAXIMUM CAPACITY. So as we compliment eachother, we benefit eachother.
Intimate relationship with God is a coupling together with God. A deep connection of complete surrender to His will. This relationship is one of complete trust and deep love, so ought marriage to be. We coupulate, we get to experience & understand intimacy in Him & we release power that touches others positively & radiates His Glory.
We are on the face of the earth to fill the earth with His Glory. Marriage relationship is God's Power flowing & touching the whole world. See more

Tee-Kay Campbell
‎@ Beloved A. Bimpe, hmmnn. Very deep! like Adejuwon said, we'll like u 2 share ur experience with us. As we know, d rate of divorce is on d rise now & dat's.. frightening. @ our bro George.. lol, ultimately, marriage is all about love & Go...d is love. If one has true love, one'll trust, be patient ,sincere, understanding, kind, show love, give, put d spouse 1st after God, support his/her vision, crown d marriage with & base it on God... Once we understand dat we cant successfully handle marriage by our strenght but trust God 4 wisdom & we play our parts, i believe most marriages be intact.See more

Tee-Kay Campbell
In order not to drift from d question, marriage was designed to improve our relationship with God & spouse + to multiply, train & mould us. Though we're not yet married, this is our take.

Theunis J van Rensburg
I have not read the other comments to try write from the gut, will read the others in short while... so here goes:

"In my opinion marriage is in essence a covenant of grace that needs Grace to thrive. It is not a contract at all and you can me on that, I happen to have a law degree to prove it. If you think marriage is a contract you are in the dwang from the first step!

Blessed marriages are also interestingly not two-sided covenants, but rather a set of two one-sided covenants, stating: "I commit to love and only you, forever and unconditionally..."

Marriages are also not contracts in the roman-dutch sense in that they do not constitute a state of ownership. That has somehow crept into some marriages, but it is actually called slavery and cowards practice it. If you say you model this ownership after some god or religion, I say your god is then also a coward, simple.

The community in marriage works best in simulation of the perichoresis principle - or circuminsession - meaning a state of mutual inter-penetration and indwelling, which is why sex that serves as a sacrament of this perichoresis is sacred and belongs in the covenant. Sex is a symbol of the safe state of "being one" or incarnation. Idiots cheat their wives or husbands in this regard and if for some reason of a god or religion you feel justified in cheating your wife or husband I will also say your god is then an idiot, simple too. The same applies if said god or religion models marriage as a place where a partner can be controlled, manipulated, dominated, raped or any other form of execution of ownership.

True love does not have to serve, it wants to. True love does not have to lay its life down for another, it chooses to. True love does not have to be loyal, it desires to.

It is a mystery, I always remind my wife she belongs to me, but I do not own her. This I say with a sparkle in my eye!!!"See more
Friday at 10:11 · LikeUnlike

Favour Arit Onobo
After creation God said, “It is not good that the man should be alone”. I will make him an help meet for him. Note the word ‘alone.’ That means loneliness is not good. And the help God wanted to offer the man is not a helpmeet nor a helpmat...e (ie servant), but two words- a help meet for him. That is a help fit or suitable for him. The word meet in the original means a front, a part opposite, a counterpart, or mate. Man’s companion, or help, was to correspond to him. Each was to be suited to the other’s needs.

This help could not be found among the creatures which he had already made. He therefore caused a deep sleep to fall upon Adam. And He took one of his ribs, and made a woman, and brought her unto the man. Again notice that God did not make man after the order of the lower animals, but “in His own image.” Neither did He choose man’s companion, or “help” from some other order of beings, but made her from man- of the same substance. And He took this substance, not from man’s feet, that he might have an excuse to degrade, enslave, or trample upon her, nor from man’s head, that woman might assume authority over man, but from man’s side, from over his heart, the seat of affection, that woman might stand at his side as man’s equal, and, side by side with him, together, under God, work out the purpose and destiny of the race. Man- the strong, the noble, the dignified. Woman- the weaker, the sympathetic, the loving.

It was designed not only for the purpose of peopling the earth and perpetuating the race, but to promote social order and human happiness, to prevent irregular affection. When the divine origin of marriage is recognized, and the divine principles controlling it are obeyed, nmarriage is indeed a blessing. But when these are disregarded, untold evils are sure tofollow. That which, rightly used, is of greatest blessing, when abused becomes the greatest curse. May that not be our portion IJN. Let marriage be had in honour among all- (Heb 134)

Adetunji O. O. Basorun
Marriage should be a union in HARMONY giving JOY (or HAPPINESS) and PEACE!

Theunis J van Rensburg
To expand on what Favour posted...

"When God creates Eve, he calls her an 'ezer kenegdo'. "It is not good for the man to be alone, I shall make him a [ezer kenegdo]" (Gen. 2:18 Alter). This phrase is notoriously difficult to translate.

The ...various attempts we have in English tend to be "helper" or "companion" or the notorious "help meet." Why are these translations so incredibly wimpy, boring, flat?Disappointing? What is a help meet, anyway? What little girl dances through the house singing "One day I shall be a help meet?" Companion? A dog can be a GREAT companion. Helper? Sounds like Hamburger Helper.

Hebrew scholar Robert Alter is getting close when he translates it "sustainer beside him."

The word ezer is used only 20 other places in the entire Old Testament. And in every other instance the person being described is God himself, when you need him to come through for you desperately.

God is your only hope. Your ezer. If he is not there beside you, you are dead. A better translation therefore of ezer would be "life-saver." Kenegdo means alongside, or opposite to, a counterpart.

You see, the life God calls us to is not a safe life. Ask Joseph, Abraham, Moses, Deborah, Esther - any of the friends of God from the Old Testament. Ask Mary and Lazarus, ask Peter, James and John, ask Priscilla and Aquila - any of the friends of God in the New Testament. God calls us to a life involving frequent risks and many dangers. Why else would we need him to be our ezer? You don't need a life-saver if your mission is couch potato. You need an ezer when your life is in constant danger.

That longing in the heart of a woman to share life together as a great adventure - that comes straight from the heart of God, who also longs for this. He does not want to be an option in our lives. He does not want to be an appendage, a tag-along. Neither does any woman. God is essential. Eve is essential. She has an irreplaceable role to play."

(Adapted from "Captivating" by the Eldridges p 31-33)See more

Adetunji O. O. Basorun
Er ...
Guys!, I usually like to keep things simple (Probably 'cos I recall someone saying that "the Mastery of a subject is shown by stating it simply").
All the 'academics' is good, but my focus is the Universal view of What Marriage is desi...gned for.
If it is not HARMONIOUS, then it's probably not even a Marriage in the first place.
If it denies you your JOY and PEACE, should you continue making that scarifice?
If u're a cliffhanger and ur partner is a sky diver, and this works for both of U, then that's great.
On the other hand, if U can't both enjoy a simple conversation together, then y'all need to re-evaluate the nature of your union.See more

Bimpe Olayinka-Oluwayemi Success
The institution of marriage was designed to achieve God’s purposes, fulfill, and to enjoy our lives on earth. First God created Man (Adam) in order to express and demonstrate His love for mankind, and also to enjoy our fellowship with Him. ...His compassionate heart and love for man made Him to create a woman (Eve) for Adam to fill the vacuum of loneliness as the bible records: "…It is not good that man should be alone: I will make him an help meet for him” (Genesis 2:18). So the first and most important reason for marriage is 1. Companionship. Companionship encompasses fellowship between the two people in marriage. Just as God enjoys our fellowship with HIM, husbands and wives should enjoy fellowship with each other and they should be each other's best friends. There cannot be good fellowship without proper communication so this is equally important. Also one cannot fellowship alone and we need company to be able to carry out our lifelong purposes. “Two are better than one because they have a good reward for their labour” (Ecclesiastes 4:9). You learn and understand each other through fellowship and communication, which subsequently develops to intimacy, one that an outsider will find difficult to break. This is of course the goal of the relationship between husband and wife. Obedience to the word of God is the key to enjoying each other. It is what holds the marriage together. Each person must understand one another's role. ‘Wives submit yourselves unto YOUR OWN husbands, as unto the LORD. For the husband is the head of the wife, even as Christ is the head of the church: and He is the saviour of the body” (Ephesians 5:22-23) "Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for it;” (Ephesians 5:25). The woman was created as “an help meet”, therefore support for your husband is one of the keys to a successful marriage.
2. Another reason for marriage is to prevent the act of sexual responsibility ordained by God, from occurring outside of marriage. The marriage is between one man and one woman, not one man and many women, neither one woman and many men. God specifically said after the creation of Adam and Eve, “Therefore shall a man leave his father and his mother, and shall CLEAVE unto his wife: and they shall be one flesh" (Genesis 2:24). The two becoming one has spiritual implications. It refers to the sexual relationship between the man and his wife which God ordained for procreation so as to increase and multiply the world. Becoming one means no one should come between the two that has become one. If you are one and someone or something comes between, then there will be a serious damage! Or how do you try to separate what has become ONE, you will either have to tear apart, severe or cut! This was designed by God for man to carry out the work started at creation by increasing and multiplying as we see in His commandment in Genesis 1:28 “ Be fruitful and multiply, and replenish the earth…”, it was to be done as husband and wife NOT outside of marriage. As God enjoys fellowship with his creation, the more we are the more fellowship He enjoys and the more love He expresses and subsequently, the more blessings He pours down on us. So for procreation purpose God ordained the institution of marriage. It is therefore a blessing to be one of the channels of continuing the work of God on earth by getting married.See more

Asher Adedire
Marriage: 2 good halves coming 2gether to form a perfect whole.

GHA Words On Marble II.

You can tell when a person is living in God's Grace. They have peace in their hearts and are at peace with their neighbours. They're quick to show mercy and slow to condemn.

Nothing kills idealism more than poverty. Yet, it's through lack, that the passion for idealism is tested.

Innovation is one heck of a status quo changer...little wonder people at the helm of affairs want more of the same. your rival a head start.

God said His people should pray if they want change...the people argue, they have prayed, and its time for action...and God retorted, when did His people pray? It is only the fervent prayer of the righteous that avails...not that of the syncretic, hypocritical zealots...God wins.

The Messenger and the Method may be different, but as long as the Message remains the same, then it is well...don't divide the Body...Heaven doesn't have compartments.

Bitterness, the root of unforgiveness. Love, the root of mercy.

The best way to obey the 1st Commandment is by obeying the 2nd Commandment.

What's the use running, if you are going up the wrong mountain. STOP! Where you are. Define your purpose, then continue running, in the right direction.

A leader cannot be said to have vision if all his ideas are short term.

Churchianity is not Christianity...the latter is Christlikeness, the other is of no divine consequence.

A woman's love is like a gushes out for all to see. A man's love is like an iceberg...its all there, just hidden under the waters...waiting to be melted by the rising heat of a woman's love.

Those who never used to "act" when they were young, will probably never know exactly what to do when they mature. A lesson for the commentators who keep asking others to "take action", but they themselves don't know what "actions" to take.

Athletes are used to opposition. You don't get to be champion without defeating them all. But politicians? That's another matter.

Mercy is not patience. Mercy is total erasure...patience is judgement delayed.

I like it when some say age is just a number - but I don't get why they keep trying to look younger.

Great sprinters know, to get ahead of your rival while on the track, all you need to do is raise your knees and pump the arms. No need to cross lanes and pull down the rival. Politicians should learn from great sprinters.

A winning Sprinter is one who has great acceleration at the start and least deceleration at the finish. You don't win at the start of the race, but at the end. A great start in life is no guarantee of a great finish...let's learn to invest our abilities for a superb finish in life.

Parents have been in the business of looking for spouses for the children since the beginning of the age. See, Adam didn't ask for a wife, but God gave him one anyway.

Methinks when God said "It is not good for Man to be alone"...he had Cain/Abel and Esau/Jacob in mind. Chaps would have decimated themselves from creation if He hadn't given Man a comparable, but delectable alter ego to smoothen the rough edges.

There are many ways to demonstrate love for another: Chastisement is also a way, as is rebuke, and also discipline. But I bet, many still think think lying on a bed full of roses, with Denzel, or Sophia Lauren is the ultimate demonstration of love. If you want to know Love, ask Jesus.

The Audacities...

My inspired piece of writings on audacious patterns of life.

The Audacity of Love: Is a woman telling a potential rival for her man's love..."go try your best, he is not that type of man"

Audacious Love: A convict being rehabilitated in the Church, went on rampage, raped the Pastor's 15 year old daughter...she became pregnant. As the pastor pondered over mixed emotions he heard the Lord say "Remember you just came out of the prison for murder? Love him as I love you, and help him". And the Pastor has adopted the rapist, and is caring for his grandchild. I met him.

An Audacious Seed: Solomon's 1000 Burnt Offerings.

An Audacious Request: "Give me a child or I die".

The Audacity of Calling: Daniel telling a Babylonian king he will surely die - and the king rewards Daniel for his pronouncement.

The Audacity of Judgement: Is God killing, by flooding, the same things He created in Love...Mercy follows repentance - judgement follows disobedience...

The Audacity of Covenant: Is when Hosea pays to "re-purchase" his own wife who had gone back into harlotry...a bargain is a bargain, talan tolo...

The Audacity of Faith: Is leaving your house with a dollar and a mouth full of praises, knowing you are coming back with a bountiful harvest.

The Audacity of Promise: When you become exceedingly prosperous, regardless of which side of the field you are tilling.

The Audacity of Faith
: Is when you look at a Mountain, and all you see are Steps to your Glory

The Audacity of Faith: To be still when all around you is storm.

The Audacity of Love: After you're done as a Prodigal, as long as you return, HE still sets up a table before the presence of your enemies. Ps23.

The Audacity of Love: Is when a an innocent Man decides to go to prison on your behalf...J316.

The Audacity of Grace: Is that Jesus revealed His Messianic role to the rejected Samarian woman, even before He was revealed to His 12 chosen Disciples...Come on folks lets go fetch some water. (Grace4Grace)

The Audacity of Grace: Is when a policeman stops you for over-speeding, but rather than giving you a ticket, gives you a cheque.

The Audacity of Faith: Faith is the rocket fuel we need to propel a jet into space, against the pull of gravity.